I watched an episode of the latest iteration of “Scooby-Doo” the other night, and it really freaked me out. Seriously, it was genuinely kinda scary. The scenes where Velma was displaying romantic interest in Shaggy? I mean, that was just goosebump city, right there.

Sorry for the slight delay. We’re in the process of moving from one house to another. Last night, I disconnected the TV, DVR, cable modem and everything in preparation for moving them to the new house today. After doing so, I sat down to draw my comic.

It was then that I realized that it would be mightily difficult to update the website…

The longer I don’t touch the Apple IIgs in my basement, the more I’m afraid that the disks won’t work anymore, but as long as I don’t touch them, I can imagine that they’re as pure and pristine as they were on some random Tuesday in 1988…

It’s ’80s computer edition of Catch-22.

Ah, yes. Mitch has had his first Geek-Rant™. I’ve run across quite a few non-geeks who, after getting into a show with a shortened season, have a similar reaction, rejecting the need for reruns or “filler” episodes, and instead demanding continued excellent storytelling across an entire (American) season of episodes.

We geeks rarely know how to respond, ’cause non-geeks rarely agree with us.

During my lunch break today, I found an online edition of a game I played when I was younger. As a boy, this game filled me with a sense of fear, dread, and impending doom like nothing other than the worst of nightmares could. Don’t get me wrong; I thoroughly enjoyed the game, but anything that can make you feel uneasy looking at a smiley face is sure to taint a part of your soul.

That game was the Atari version of Berzerk.

The heart-thumping induced by the increasing speed of the lasers; the fear of touching anything lest you die; and finally, that inevitable, unstoppable bouncing Smiley Face (Evil Otto) that just keeps coming and coming…no matter how many of the endless series of rooms and corridors you run through. It can really freak you out.

But then, last night, my son and I giggled nigh-uncontrollably at Daffy insisting that it was indeed not “wabbit season” but that it was “duck season” and that Elmer should shoot directly at Daffy, thus dislocating the amuck duck’s bill.

Man, I had a violent childhood.

Upon completion of this comic, the Eponymous Neaner declared, “Y’know, your brain is a scary place.”

Psh. Like she has any idea. I should know. I’ve been there often.

• Captain Renault: Round up the usual suspects.
• Rick: You’ll excuse me, gentlemen. Your business is politics, mine is running a saloon.
• Rick: Here’s looking at you kid.
• Rick: How can you close me up? On what grounds?
  Captain Renault: I’m shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on in here!
  [a croupier hands Renault a pile of money]
  Croupier: Your winnings, sir.
  Captain Renault: [sotto voce] Oh, thank you very much.
  [aloud]
  Captain Renault: Everybody out at once!
• Rick: Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
• Berger: We read five times that you were killed, in five different places.
  Victor Laszlo: As you can see, it was true every single time.
• Rick: Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine.

And so, so many more. See? Who says geekly obsessions only have to be about fantasy or science fiction?

It wouldn’t be so bad if the voiceovers sounded even remotely similar to the actors. Now, granted things have gotten better in recent years on that front, but “I don’t wanna see any monkey-fightin’ snakes on this Monday-to-Friday plane!”??!? Seriously?! Can’t the censors come up with anything that makes even the tiniest lick of sense?

Although, that one is kinda funny…

I always get mildly freaked out when I hit this point with a word. There’s a tiny, irrational – and honestly, rather stupid – part of me that wonders if I’ll ever again know how to spell the word “quiet,” or what “turnip” means. Is this what it’s like to be crazy? Or senile? To know that things have meaning and purpose, but for that meaning to be forever just beyond your reach? Just tickling a ringing bell in the back of the brain that will never grow clearer?

Wow. Um…Okay. Now, I think I’m officially freaking out…

I’m still trying to figure out what Mitch wanted Jane’s “nerdish, yet feminine” opinion on…